Dream Symbols from Dreammoods.com:
The Color White
White represents purity, perfection, peace, innocence, dignity, cleanliness, awareness, and new beginnings. You may be experiencing a reawakening or have a fresh outlook on life.
In general, shoes represent your approach to life. Wearing shoes in your dream suggests that you are well-grounded or down to earth. It also represents your convictions about your beliefs. If you are changing your shoes, then it refers to your changing roles. You are taking a new approach to life.
In kindergarten, I fell in love with a boy named J—. He was an adorable kindergartner – blond hair, a perfect smile.
I’m not sure how much I knew about J— when I was five, but one of my earliest memories is knowing our father’s were connected. The two men had started a paving company during their early twenties.
A year and four months before J— and I showed up at St. Mary’s of the Knobs for our first day of kindergarten, my father drowned.
Knowing the little I now know about life, and boys, and daddy issues, I still wonder about that first crush. Psychically, it seems, my attraction had more to do with J—‘s connection to my missing father, than the blond haired boy sitting Indian-style on the floor next to me, reciting his ABCs.
J— and I continued to be classmates all the way through high school, but my crush didn’t last beyond St. Mary’s.
I can’t remember the last time I saw him. In the past, I’ve run into J— or his wife around town. Last summer, I saw his uncle whose granddaughters played in the same softball league as my daughter.
But then, out of nowhere, he showed while I was sleeping the other night.
In my dream, I am at his house, and he is giving me a pair of shoes. I think it’s odd to be there, at his house, but I really, really want the shoes. They are white ballet-style flats with a lace trim detail. He’s there with his wife and kids, and no one, except me, finds it strange that I’m there to get shoes.
I thought about that dream the entire next day. The meaning of the shoes, their color. Mostly, I wondered why my subconscious chose my very first crush to hand them over.
During my run yesterday, I connected J— to my father and my first memory of his work.
Him owning that business, and me now owning what I want to write. My first crush – the boy I attach to my father’s work – handing me the very thing I need to “take a fresh outlook on life.”
Of course, this could all be bunk. I could be making wild leaps in the dream interpretation department, and Freud was most likely a drug-crazed misogynist.
But, that daddy stuff always seems to linger in the most peculiar ways.